Friday, March 12, 2010

The Love Doctor

"Loving someone is giving them the power to hurt you, but trusting them not to"

A memory of true love is like a favorite song; No matter how many times it plays, You never get tired of it."

"You don't marry someone you can live with - you marry the person who you cannot live without."

Love is not enough It must be the foundation the cornerstone-but not the complete structure It is much too pliable too yielding. Bette Davis

Love is blind, yet we use our eyes to determined how we feel

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Who's ever right anyway? "The Harmful affects of words"

You have to be careful with the words you use when you are in a relationship, because the nature of the words you use can be the difference between the progression and regression of your relationship. A lot of couples tend to say things that they do not mean when they are angry. That usually leads to a lot of I of I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, or I was just upset . You need to avoid that as much as possible. My mother always used to tell me to 'pick my battles", but that is often hard to do. Sometimes we as men can often get caught up in trying to be right even when we are at times and lose sight of the discussion. No offense, but men have a need to make sense and sometimes when the conversation doesn't make sense we end up in a verbal battle of words. In order to sustain a healthy relationship with your significant other you have to concentrate on building each other up, not putting each other down.
Words affect many different faucets of your relationships. You have to communicate when you are in a relationship. Sometimes a simple" how was your day" or "thank you" can go a long way when you are with someone. Telling your partner that you love them or miss them can at often times erase a certain level of doubt that your partner may have about your level of commitment. In other words tell your partner how you feel early and often. You never want to say anything that can make your significant other feel unappreciated , low ,or stupid. When you look back on your disagreements you will realize that there were a few words that elevated your discussion from a conversation into an argument.
Words also can contribute to the trust in your relationship or lack there of. You need to be honest even when seems like it may not be what the person wants to hear. At least when they decide on whether or not they want to resume being with you that they have everything that they need to know right in front of them. Being discrete can make the person believe you are lying even when you are not. Don't look it as telling them your every move. Look at it as being honest and eliminating any room for doubt. This is hard to do, but it is necessary. The more you tell the truth the better things are for you in the long run. Remember when you used to tell her that you were going out with your home boys and she would get mad. Now she is asking you to go out with them, because she is confident that you are where you say you are going to be. Just remember that everything that you say in a relationship will be used against you, so if you don't want to keep explaining yourself or apologizing don't keep digging ditches that you can't get out of.