Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Who's ever right anyway? "The Harmful affects of words"

You have to be careful with the words you use when you are in a relationship, because the nature of the words you use can be the difference between the progression and regression of your relationship. A lot of couples tend to say things that they do not mean when they are angry. That usually leads to a lot of I of I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, or I was just upset . You need to avoid that as much as possible. My mother always used to tell me to 'pick my battles", but that is often hard to do. Sometimes we as men can often get caught up in trying to be right even when we are at times and lose sight of the discussion. No offense, but men have a need to make sense and sometimes when the conversation doesn't make sense we end up in a verbal battle of words. In order to sustain a healthy relationship with your significant other you have to concentrate on building each other up, not putting each other down.
Words affect many different faucets of your relationships. You have to communicate when you are in a relationship. Sometimes a simple" how was your day" or "thank you" can go a long way when you are with someone. Telling your partner that you love them or miss them can at often times erase a certain level of doubt that your partner may have about your level of commitment. In other words tell your partner how you feel early and often. You never want to say anything that can make your significant other feel unappreciated , low ,or stupid. When you look back on your disagreements you will realize that there were a few words that elevated your discussion from a conversation into an argument.
Words also can contribute to the trust in your relationship or lack there of. You need to be honest even when seems like it may not be what the person wants to hear. At least when they decide on whether or not they want to resume being with you that they have everything that they need to know right in front of them. Being discrete can make the person believe you are lying even when you are not. Don't look it as telling them your every move. Look at it as being honest and eliminating any room for doubt. This is hard to do, but it is necessary. The more you tell the truth the better things are for you in the long run. Remember when you used to tell her that you were going out with your home boys and she would get mad. Now she is asking you to go out with them, because she is confident that you are where you say you are going to be. Just remember that everything that you say in a relationship will be used against you, so if you don't want to keep explaining yourself or apologizing don't keep digging ditches that you can't get out of.


  1. Great incite! Great post! All of it true. Words are so powerful and so we must choose them wisely, especially during a verbal disagreement. Words can heal or harm. You choose! And being honest is very immportant in sustaining a relationship...with no hidden secrets, no hidden agenda's both parties are in the present and should know the person they are with is showing their trueself and not their representative.

  2. @Mizrepresents....So true. Put it all on the table. U will be better for it.

  3. Words are def powerful. Most people dont even think before they say things which is bad for any situation. Words that are put out are a certain type of energy if u put out nothing but negative then it will only return to you. There's a such thing as speaking things up. Been plenty of times I have mentioned someones name & next thing I know I see them or they are calling me. Watch what you say those words can come back to haunt you. Nice post.

  4. Words carry more power than we understand. Most of the time those words are between an arguement. I chose not to argue, it solves NOTHING...I will go my seprate way until the situation calms down then discuss...

  5. @This That, And The Other...So true. I really believe in anything you say will be held against you.

    @JStar....I feel u 100...I also prefer to calm down and then discuss, but we've all had our moments.

  6. If it's a two way street I believe and have experienced the fact that any couple can and will overcome being lost, at times.

    But if it's a one way street, one-sided relationship, there isn't anything that can be done, except walk away with your dignity intact.

    Words are powerful, I wholeheartedly agree. And I also agree that actions speak louder than any words.

    Great read.

  7. @Don..... Couldn't agree wit u more.

  8. @Erie_Quite_Contrary...... Thanks 4 stopping bye :)


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